Underbelly Archives

~New Years Resolution #1: I will try to use the word “fortnight” more in casual conversation.

~New Years Resolution #2: I will refrain from trying to repair complex machinery such as my car and my computer, using duct tape.

‎~New Year’s Resolution #3: I will no longer allow myself to get colds, flu, dry elbows or bad breath.

‎~New Year’s Resolution #4: I walk around sucking in my gut, and flexing my muscles, at all times, so that I may retain a more taught and youthful appearance.

~New Year’s Resolution #5: I will gorge myself on red wine and potato chips only for medicinal purposes.

~New Year’s Resolution #6: I will try to be patient, understanding, and empathetic when jerk-off people are being total assholes.

~New Year’s Resolution #7: I will be very disciplined about doing my artwork, except when watching tv, lying around eating potato chips, or drunk.

~New Years Resolution #8: I will not blame others for my problems, no matter how much my problems are their fault.

~New Years Resolution #9: I will never let my fantasies prevent me from living my reality–or is it vice versa?

~New Years Resolution #10: As I move forward with my life, I will not harbor any second guesses or regrets about all the horrendous, heartbreaking, tragic, unbelievably stupid choices that have led me down this road to hell.